A Runner’s Guide to Spontaneous Goaltending Part I

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March 8, 2014 by Amy B

Game 1 – How not to get ready for a hockey game

  • Leave an hour and fifteen minutes late and worry for the first three hours that you’re not going to make it to the rink on time.
  • Eat a Filet-O-Fish sandwich en route.
  • Be in the practice of not strapping on the pads more than, oh, ONE WEEKEND A YEAR.
  • Have your first game be at 10:00PM (past your regular bed time, hello old).
  • Arrive at the rink with just enough time to find the bathroom, get lost on the way to the locker room, and have to put unstrap your pads after putting them on (arduous task) because you forgot a strap by the toe (see bullet #4).
  • Be a runner, not a goalie.

The bird ended up on the helmet. I’m thinking I should just put a bullseye on my chest or glove (the only shots I have any confidence of stopping/catching).

The arena is a beaut. I’m not sure how old it is but I think it’s undergone some heavy remodeling in the last few years. The layout is still a little odd (no bathrooms/showers in the locker room?) but it’s bright, clean (by hockey arena standards) and seems like a nice place to play. I can’t speak to the condition of the ice rink-wide, but it seemed excellent.

As for my performance, I definitely would not classify it as excellent. More like survivorist.

In the end, I let in six goals. Since the other goalie only let in three, that means we lost (for you non-hockey fans out there). One of the goals did go off a defenseman’s shin (not entirely my fault), but by the time this happened, the game was well out of reach. Eight skaters doesn’t help the situation (for reference, five skate at a time), and our bench was at least 75% shorter than the other team’s. Yeah. It happens.

But on to the next game. We clearly won’t be playing in the championship now (it’s a weird pool play arrangement) but winning might get us out of playing the 8:15AM game on Sunday morning. Yeah, I’d like to avoid that if possible.

But I’m reminded that no one made me do this, and that it’s supposed to be fun. The girls who invited me were well aware of my (lack of) skillset, so they knew what they were getting.

I’d really like to put forth a better performance today, though. And since I’ve carb-loaded with possibly the worst hotel breakfast I’ve ever had, what could go wrong? Also: no Filet-O-Fish sandwiches today, please.

PickyPower at least four hours past her bedtime

Side note: The kids are having a blast.

We had the entire pool to ourselves for about 45 minutes this morning. Aaron finally got in the water after being hesitant (and smacking his head on the floor, spaz).

I swam the length of the pool about four times and will consider that my cardio workout for the day. Wow, swimming is hard. I’m starting to rethink that summer triathlon goal.

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Runner, Eater, Mother, Tweeter

Amy, July 2013

I'm a thirty-something suburbanite turned ruralite living in the Upper Peninsula of Michigan. Wife, mom of two, eater of all things delicious, and a runner. This is where I blather on about running and health. Baby Number Three will be here in November (so yes, I'm a little crazy), and I'm running through my pregnancy for as long as my body's willing and able. There's also more of me at amyupnorth.com. Read more here.


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